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And the doe-eyed guy who I actually started to fall for—until I realized I needed to reserve my love for a man who could text me back on time.Even though some of these guys hurt me, each was critical to my journey.“I could have [anyone] I wanted,” says Rochkind, now 40 and an Upper East Sider with a muscular build and a full head of hair.“I met some nice people, but realistically I went for the hottest girl you could find.” He spent the better part of his 30s going on up to three dates a week, courting 20-something blond models, but eventually realized that dating the prettiest young things had its drawbacks — he found them flighty, selfish and vapid.Wouldn't it make sense, then, that he'd be older, too – richer in life experience, to guide us through our lives? It's a clear parallel with the idea that the male partner should be taller than the woman – which, as Tracey Spicer wrote last week, is a result of unconscious bias that subtly reinforces gender stereotypes and expectations.There was always talk, too, of the idea that men mature at a slower rate than women.
What do you actually say to someone you're trying to let go easily? We get busy, we set our sights on someone else, or we simply forget—whatever the reason might be (or lack thereof), we find ourselves faced with the cold hard truth: We've ghosted someone. No one actually enjoys knowing that they've left someone hanging—and potentially feeling miserable—whether on purpose or not.It's easy to blame our short attention span on the overwhelming number of fish in the sea (or in this case, dating apps); on today's casual dating culture, where the word "official" is scarier than going shark diving without the cage; or on the assumption that if the other person wasn't ghosting you as well, has another theory: We actually ghost because of our own fears and insecurities—neither trait being particularly appealing or sexy.Here’s what the 29-year-old entertainer and actress had to share: On her relationship with ex-husband Mike Comrie: “Mike’s amazing… I meet, like, one person a year that I’m maybe attracted to…I never want to be that girl who’s desperate to find a mate.” On turning 30: “I think I’m a pretty confident person.